Roots grow and crawl from your toes, legs burr and burn like industrial machines, the back is resisting unknown forces, there are vines of energy connecting your little finger to your back to your ankles and back around again, your shoulders melt and tiny water droplets fall off your wrists and fingers like collected dew drops and your head is sparkling fairy dust. You are in the constant grace and presence of flow and bewilderment.
I let go. I let go of my opinions. I let go of my thoughts. I let go of my jokes. I let go of my responses. I let go of cleverness and judgements. I let go of explanation and reason. I let go of every single opportunity to speak.
IT WAS LIBERATING.
Something was calling out to me, I knew it. Funny, I hadn’t even started with my “insight” meditation practice but, deep down, I knew for sure that something was calling. And that I needed to take heed.
The Philippines celebrates its Independence Day every June 12th. I love my country and I love my freedom. But I think there is great need today for my country and its people to rethink what true freedom means to them. When I entered my singing group The Ryan Cayabyab Singers, this mash-up of two songs,Read moreRead more
At week one of world lockdown, I overheard my neighbor expressing concern on when the waste collector might come around because their trash bin is filled up. At pre-quarantine panic in California, a friend of mine shared that sanitary napkins were quickly wiped out from supermarket stalls. A lot of memes have made fun of people’sRead moreRead more
Faith is not fullness, but emptiness. It is not in the solid ground that awaits when we leap, but in the space in between. It is not in the hope that we wish to always cling to, but in the despair that drugs us into a constant search for hope in the many places it likes to flutter about. Faith is never in the knowing for sure, but always in the unconscious bewilderment and wonder for all that ever is and may or may not be.
The world is now in serious deprivation of the tenderness of the divine feminine. The divine feminine, on the other end of the scale, is about openness, harmony, devotion, surrender, receptivity, abundance, cycles, repetition, nurturance.
If we want a happier world, we should start seeing it. We should decide to start seeing it, whatever it takes. We have told ourselves this story that we have to wait for the good stuff to happen. We are now already in a world crisis and we are thinking this is the worst it has ever been. So what if it is? And so what if it is not? Let’s ask ourselves what we are waiting for next. What are we watching out for to see in this world while we are living? Do we wait to see a life that struggles or do we wait to see the next smile on the next happy face?
Think of your head as a city map bustling with highways, favored shortcuts, parks and pit stops, exhilarating viewpoints, favorite restaurants and attractions. When you sit down to meditate, you say, “Forget it all, I want to grow flowers.” So you have taken time out to sit down, decided to hush the living map in your head, and now you are just starting to find small pockets of soil, you are tilling the earth and planting seeds. You water them. You bask in the sunlight. You wait. Just breathe, smile, trust, it will grow.